Grief and loss
Loving ways to deal with death and dying
Death is a natural occurrence, a passageway. When we can accept
human death as another cycle of life, we can enjoy our daily lives
more because we won't be in fear. Then we can also gracefully
release others who are dying.
I often hear people say that they lost their mother, father,
or another person in their lives. I can feel their pain when they
express the transition in that way. I have compassion for their
feelings. To assist them to feel better, I suggest that they just
state what happened. For example, "My mother passed away
last month." I also encourage them to close their eyes and
speak to them. They are often pleased and comforted when they
receive an intuitive response.
People who have had near-death experiences report seeing a tunnel
and then a white light. There is always an angel or other being
from the light waiting to take them back to the light. They feel
nothing but unconditional love and their spirit (not their human
bodies which is the only thing that dies) soars back home to the
light. After a time of healing, they may become spirit guides
or angels for those who are living.
Even though it may not look like that, all individuals have free
will to choose when to leave the planet. No matter how they decide
to pass on, it is helpful to accept their choice. The following
suggestions can assist you to deal with death and dying in a loving
way. Put a check next to what you want to say or do.
- To help those who are dying, I can tell them in a loving way
- They are complete here and it is time to go home.
- They are worthy to return to the light.
- It is helpful to forgive others and themselves for all that
they felt was wrong, so that they can finish their unfinished
business and go in peace.
- There is nothing to be afraid of because they will be accompanied
by an angelic being.
- They can relax and just let themselves fall into a deep
sleep and transcend back into the light.
- They will be able to communicate telepathically with those
- If they choose, they can be reborn and live another life
cycle on earth.
- To help me deal with a loved ones death, I am:
- Forgiving them and myself for anything that I felt was
- Knowing that they will be totally taken care of.
- Accepting that I am whole and complete by myself.
- Understanding that I am not responsible for their passing.
- To help me cope after a loved one transitions, I am:
- Allowing myself to feel all my emotions and expressing them
in healthy ways.
- Realizing that I am likely to have feelings of denial, anger,
fear, and sadness.
- Giving myself time to grieve which is a necessary and important
part of my healing process.
- Asking myself, "What do I think that I still need from ___
(deceased name) that I can't give to myself?" (Examples: security,
Giving what I need to myself and/or allowing others to be
there for me.
- Thinking of my loved one as being happy and doing well.
- Speaking to my loved one out loud or in my mind anytime
I have something to say.
- Reading a book about near-death experiences.
- Attending a death and dying support group.
- Reaching out to people I feel close to for support.
- Seeking a professional counselor to help me cope with my
Congratulate yourself for dealing with death and dying in a loving,
About the Author:
Helene Rothschild, MS, MA, MFT, is a marriage and family therapist, intuitive
counselor, speaker, and author. The article is an excerpt from her new book, All
You Need Is Hart!: Create Love, Joy And Abundance - Now! She offers phone sessions, teleclasses, books, e-books, MP3 audios, tapes, posters,
independent studies, and a free newsletter. www.lovetopeace.com, 1-888-639-6390.